When it comes to marriage, everyone has a piece of advice to give, from your family to your neighbors, from your best friend to your coworkers. Aside from the misconceptions you may hear about marriage, sometimes you are even surprised at whom to believe. In such cases, you usually want to listen to what people who have been in a happy marriage for many years have said. In fact, it is also very important what people who have ended their marriage have to say! Who can give better advice than someone who has been married, seen the problems in that marriage, made a difficult decision, and faced his mistakes? Here are some tips for newly married couples from divorced women…
You need more than love
Everyone loves He wants to marry the person, but this does not always bring the happy ending in fairy tales. Love is not enough to be happy in real life. Most of the divorced couples say that they married the person they fell in love with, but their marriage did not work out because they could not think rationally while making a decision. They advise those who are going to get married to choose a spouse they can respect , be friends with and look at life from the same point of view. Because marriage is a lifelong partnership and loving your partner is not enough to make things work.
The change you want may never happen
Men get married hoping that women won’t change, and women get married hoping that men will change, albeit a cliché. Many women get married, thinking that they can change the man and rasp the aspects they don’t like. Yes, people change, but you cannot change them. First of all, you have to want to change. Besides, how healthy is it to make a promise to be with someone for life , hoping they’ll get better ? No relationship will last forever where you can’t accept each other as you are.
You don’t have to be together all the time
Marriage means you have to spend every moment together. This is one of the most common problems of divorced couples. They talk about the fact that they can’t spend every moment together and spare time for themselves, that they don’t have time to review the problems because they don’t have their private space, and that this brings the end of the relationship . The newly married couples leaving private spaces for each other both increase the longing and revive love, and provide time to escape and calm down when problems arise.
You have to voice your doubts
It’s actually the beginning of the end when you start putting things in. It is inevitable that a relationship in which problems cannot be discussed will deteriorate over time. Do you suspect that your spouse is cheating on you, but do you keep silent to avoid being stigmatized as a jealous woman? Don’t be silent, being a jealous woman is a better chance than being cheated on. If you think he doesn’t love you the way he used to, speak up, if his silence is uncomfortable, speak up. Even the worst outcome is better than living in doubt and eventually everything just piles up and explodes.
You don’t have to accept it
Is your spouse mistreating you? Problems in your relationship? Did your marriage turn out as you hoped? Whatever the problem, you don’t have to accept anything.