What should a woman do when she finds out she has been cheated on?

What should a woman do when she finds out she has been cheated on? The rates of cheating are increasing in marriages, but this is not reflected in the divorce rates as much. Because the cheating party is usually the man, and women find it difficult to end their bad marriages despite being cheated on. The biggest reason for this situation is that many women do not know what to do when they are cheated on, especially they are not informed about their legal rights . Thinking about what to do in case of cheating, how to behave and how to protect children in the process makes the situation even more difficult. Flow Coaching Academic Director, Parent Coach and Therapist Talyaa Vardar answered Aboutrelationship.net’s questions about cheating.

What should a woman do when she finds out she has been cheated on?


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Why do men cheat?

The male “always knows best” or “whatever he says is right” approach seen in patriarchal societies is unfortunately a common situation in our country. We can definitely say that; Turkish men are now cheating on them. Why hide it, almost getting applause as it degenerates. If his wife does not leave either; morality, virtue, family integrity , healthy growth of children cannot be within the limits of Turkish men’s ego. In this case, it would not be wrong to say that the only thing men think about is their own personal tastes. The main reason for cheating is actually ego. For example, a man who is with a woman who is at a higher level than himself can only satisfy his ego in the woman whose wife he cheated on. This makes cheating more attractive. On the other hand, there may also be cases of cheating due to the spouses not taking care of themselves. A man who cannot see the attention he seeks and wants to see at home, can seek the solution outside . Of course, these are just defense mechanisms that the man develops himself. The most important branch that cheating men cling to is the excuse of “it was a one-night stand”, but it should not be forgotten that; Usually, men who cheat once can make cheating a routine if the relationship has not been discussed and the woman has accepted the situation.

Is it right to seek fault with the cheated woman?

Since the relationship is mutual, saying “one side is wrong” is a bit of extrajudicial execution. There can be no such thing as “the cheating man is right”, but it is necessary to consider this; Men live life with straight logic. Therefore, they can deceive themselves and ease their conscience with the inferences that my wife does not care enough for me or my wife does not take care of herself. But these justifications are not enough to admit that the deceived woman was wrong.

Only men cheat?

It’s clear that the idea that “only men cheat” has remained with the previous generation. Because now women are also cheating . However, unlike the cheating of a man, the subject of cheating carries a greater risk for women, since women are usually with men with whom they have an emotional bond . Both the responsibility of cheating and a new disappointment on an already unhappy relationship can lead to permanent trust problems in women.

Is forgiveness an invitation to the next mistake?

Since the entity we are talking about is human, I believe that a definite judgment cannot be reached on this matter. Because after the man is forgiven, he learns from the mistake

What should the first thing the cheated woman do?

It should be learning your legal rights. Whether you’re considering leaving or not, if a child is involved, I recommend that you learn the law well for yourself and your child. This will also help you review your steps in the process. However, there is a

cheating spouse, what are the legal rights?

Proving that you were deceived will affect the court’s evaluation of your claim for non-pecuniary damage . The sadness, grief, humiliation you experience due to your spouse’s fault determines the amount of moral compensation to be awarded. Being cheated on is a situation that wears you out and inflicts moral damage, and requires you to receive a higher amount of non-pecuniary compensation.

Is it possible to get children out of this situation with minimal damage?

First of all, it should not be forgotten that in the case of infidelity in marriage, the most injured party is always the children. In the heart of every child, his or her parents are perfect, and in such a case, the castles that the child has built in his mind begin to collapse one by one. In fact, the child who witnesses the arguments has permanent damage that can be observed in the future . In this process, the child should be kept away from the discussion environment as much as possible. When the parent relationship ends, the child must be assured that nothing will change for the child.


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